


The Great Emu War

by Banner4Hetalia



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Honestly Charles What Are You Thinking, bob is cool, bob the emu, cameo of england, cameo of prussia, crack take on history, damnit johnaton, do your homework kids, england is done with austrailia's shit, history is weird, if you squint hard, scotland is austrailia's dad, slight rusame - Freeform, you had one job randy, you won't learn this in school kids
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-01
Updated: 2018-09-01
Packaged: 2019-07-05 07:42:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 39
Words: 5,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15859239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Banner4Hetalia/pseuds/Banner4Hetalia
Summary: Not many people of the Great Emu War, the horror that austraila himself faced, this is his story





	1. Chapter 1

**7:00**

**November 2**

**1932**

**Dear Diary,**

The dawn was cresting over the bush,  
I knew that my country was facing one of its greatest threats ever to face Australia.

**Emus**

Those damn birds just keep coming in mobs.

Come high noon, we shall ride on our crocs and destroy these damn birds!

~time skip~

Crocs apparently don't like it when you jump on their back and scream, "Crawl!"   
Hopefully these stitches won't get in the way

                                           **Jett Kirkland**  
                           **Australia**


	2. Day 2

**8:30**

**November 3**

**1932**

Dear Diary

A couple of my people and I are going by truck to try and shoot these damn things.

I suggested almost going in kangas, because they would obviously be faster then going in these damn trucks and-

Shit there's like A hundred of them

I'm gonna  **kill**  all these damn ostrich imposters

~Time skip~

Apparently these damn birds can take a fucking bullet or two, unfortunately most of them got away

Killed like 5 of them, I don't care what Johnathan says, I took down 5.

I'll get the rest of them tomorrow

                                       **Jett Kirkland**  
 **Australia**


	3. Day 3

**9:00**

**November 4**

**1932**

Dear Diary

We went to our enemies today for aid in our battle

Today we tried to make a treaty with the dingos, apparently they can't read

Shot a lot of dingos today, one of them bit Johnathan on the ass, I didn't shoot that one

                                            **Jett Kirkland**  
                                            **Australia**


	4. Day 4

**6** **:30**

**November 5**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Today we awoke to our camp site being destroyed by those damn flightless bastards

We must send for new supplies as all those assholes ate all the good shit I'd been hiding from the other men

My fucking Smith's Chips and Jaffas are all gone

Its fucking on now, you damn emu bastards

**Jett Kirkland**  
**Au** **stralia**  
**\------------------------------------------------**  
Jaffas are an orange-flavored shell candy with a chocolate core in case no one knew what they were


	5. Day 5

  
**10:00**

**November**   **6**

**1932**

Dear Diary

I think this asshole has finally lost it, he came in a couple of hours ago, started ripping up his pillows, and asked about paper mache

I asked why the hell he was doing this and all he can scream is "My Jaffas are all gone!"

He said he's going to disguise himself among the enemies?

Oh god this is going to be good, I'm gonna stick around and see how this plays out, hope a dingo bites him on the arse  
But first, I'm going to stop and gets some Jaffas

New Zealand

\----------------------------------  
Sassy new Zealand is based off one my very sassy friend


	6. Day 6

**9:30**

**November 7**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Today I managed to infiltrate the enemy disguised as one of them

Unfortunately one of the baby ones thought I was his mum and got a little to close to my 'opera house'

Let me say for the record I did not scream like a girl, I was just surprised

Needless to say they quickly discovered I was not one of them and proceeded to attack

That kiwi BASTARD left me here, stole my car and my Jaffas!

**Jett Kirkland**   
**A** **u** **stralia**

\---------------------------------------------------  
For those who enjoyed new Zealand, don't worry, that sassy boy shall be back


	7. Day 7

**12:00**

**November 8**

**1932**

Dear Diary  
I bet you're wondering what happened after the BASTARD left well here are the highlights

After I realized he wasn't coming back for me, I tried to run for it, didn't know emus could run up to 31 mph,

The baby emu still thought I was its mum, so it started running with me, thought about adopting this bugger, teach it my ways and send it back to it's people and try and Intel

Think I'll name her Bob, she'll probably be better than Johnathan

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**


	8. Day 8

**10:00**

**November 9**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Day 1 of my training with Bob

She seems to like New Zealand's sheep, little traitorous BASTARD, I technically kidnapped this thing, but you are my child now

He's a little too smug about the that it may like him more

It may not see me as it's mum, it may see New Zealand as it's mum

Then wait.........

Fuck that means I'm the dad

Duck my life

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**

**Ps**  
I'm not paying child support


	9. Day 9

**11:00**

**November 10**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Why can't these bastards just shut the duck up

They're been arguing over the bloody mum and who's the fucking dad for over 10 minutes now

I swear I should just shoot them both and be done with them

Wy


	10. Day 10

**Dear England**

I know you told me to keep an eye on Australia for you

I regret to inform you that he's lost his ducking mind

He started a war with emu.....  **Emus**  
Then he adopted one of them, named it Bob and is now trying to teach it to spy on its brethren.

God help us all

**New Zealand**


	11. Day 11

**9:30**

**November 12**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Today's the day, the day Bob makes her old man proud

I taught all she needs to know

Look at her go, shes-

The hell is she doing  
She's eating the crops with them

My own child that I raised- well I technically kidnapped her but still

When we get home I'm giving her a stern lecture on how to actually spy

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**


	12. Day 12

**8:30**

**November 13**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Day 2 of training with Bob

After a very stern lecture, I've decided that Bob needed to know who the real enemy is

Thanks to a couple of now destroyed pillows and paper mache, I'm going to show Bob how to attack them

This is such a great plan, I don't know why I didn't just do this from the start

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**


	13. Day 13

**Dear New Zealand**

He started a war with what?

Emus?

..*5 mins later*

So emus are large flightless bird must be bloody mad

Make sure he does not burn down the rest of his country and try to fill it with his poisonous spiders or whatever dangerous creature he has

**Yours sincerely**   
**United Kingdom**


	14. Day 14

**10:30**

**November 15**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Today I went to Japan for help with training for Bob in ninjuistu

Finally she'll how to take her brethren  
Like a feathery assassin

~update~

Sushi BASTARD said no, he said he doesn't train birds

Guess it's back to running drills with the feather duster

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**


	15. Day 15

**11:00**

**November 16**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Sometimes even I am amazed by how stupid Australia is

The ducking idiot decided to dress up  **again** as an emu to try and train Bob to attack them

Needless to say, it worked  
As soon as she saw him she got that snake-sucker good

God I can't stop laughing at this ducking munter

I can't wait to see what he's going to do tomorrow once he comes to

**New Zealand**  
\--------------------------------------  
Munter is slang in New Zealand for a person lacking intelligence who is prone to causing harm or injury to themselves


	16. Day 16

**12:00**

**November 17**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Today the is the second time I've decided to let Bob out to try to attack her former brethren   
Because she's obviously a Kirkland now

There she goes , she's running towards them shes-  
Wait Bob NO

She just attacked a tumble weed  
Wy said she might be my child because she's fucking stupid

Maybe I need to teach her how to be awesome  
Wait a bloody moment...I know who to call.


	17. Day 17

Dear Diary

**I'm AWESOME**

Greetings und Hallo you sad little babies in your dirty country filled with murder creatures....  
...ok that's kinda cool

ANYVAY.     I AM AWESOME.

if you have not realized this is the AWESOME Prussia mind I am here today to help Australia with his dinosaur bird problem.

If I can train America to defeat England I can teach a bird to not be stupid.  
  


Just look at gilbird.

Prussia the AWESOME


	18. Day 18

**9:00**

**November 19**

**1932**

Dear Diary

After Prussia arrived to 'help' yesterday things went from bad to worst

First he decided to show Bob gilbird to let her see awesome first hand

She promptly tried to eat gilbird  
Would have succeeded too had Prussia not been quick

After I 'convinced' (just gave him some beer) Prussia that I really needed his help to train Bob did we finally start the training

It lasted five minutes tops

Bob didn't like Prussia too much, little Sheila decided to bite him on his berlin wall  
Don't think I've ever heard a girlish shriek like that before  
Almost feel bad for the poor guy  
Still the best ducking thing I've ever seen

I think tomorrow while Prussia is recovering I'll just go and spy on the bastards myself

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**


	19. Day 19

**10:00**

**November 20**

**1932**

Dear Diary

I decided to go undercover by myself and spy on those demon birds

Good news is that some of my men have actually killed some of those things so that'll make my disguise a lot easier

~Time skip~

I've successfully infiltrated their group

For some reason a one of them is staring at me and doing a weird dance, perhaps this a ritual of theirs?

Maybe if I do it back they'll show me their plans of their next attack

For some reason it appears to be staring at my ass

The hell is it doing?  
Wait, it's getting behind me-

OH BLOODY FUCK NO  
I'VE ENTERED THE LAND OF NOPE

It. Touched. Me.

This is not worth it

I'm going to need so many Jaffas after this

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**


	20. Day 20

**12:30**

**November 21**

**1932**

Dear Diary

I don't know what's wrong with this asshole  
He came early from his 'spying' looking like shit

Now he's eating a shit ton of Jaffas and fantales like a teenager who just got her first period

Said he can't talk about the 'horror' of his so called mission

What the ever living duck happened to him?

**New Zealand**

\----------------------------------------------------  
Fantales are a caramel candy with a chocolate coating


	21. Day 21

**Dear** **England**

I've regret to inform that Australia grows stupider and stupider each day of this so called 'war'

It amazes me just how one person could so fucking dumb

As you've probably heard by now he called that asshole down here to train that bird of his to be more awesome

Okay, it actually turned out to be one of the better decisions as Prussia got bit on his so called 'five meters'

Then he had the bright idea to go back out there to spy on those things one last time and apparently got 'touched' by one of the male ones

Personally I think what was running through that emu's mind was 'looks ugly, but I'll take it'

**New Zealand**


	22. Day 22

**12:00**

**November 23**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Today was actually not that bad

We killed a bunch of those bastards today

The only bad thing is that SOMEONE, not naming names, forgot to grab the supplies for us

Aka the food

So we actually ended up eating a bird or two because once again SOMEONE can't pack for shit

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**

**PS**  
That someone was Jonathan


	23. Day 23

**10:00**

**November 24**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Today has not been the best

When i got home earlier, I unfortunately forgot I adopted Bob and walked in eating a leg and Bob saw me

She gave me the look  
The look of betrayal

So naturally I have to go hungry just because I'm eating her species

Then New Zealand just barged in and start eating what was left of my food

Kiwi bastard

And now thanks again to a certain SOMEONE, we have little to no bullets left

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**

**PS**  
I really need to start leaving Johnathan behind  
Maybe I'll take Randy instead


	24. Day 24

**12:00**

**November 25**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Today I tried to convince Wy to help me with a new plan of attack against those traitorous dingo bastards

Apparently my plan is 'fucking stupid and won't work'

In case you were wondering what my plan was

I was gonna have Wy be in a baby carriage, because they are baby eating BASTARDS, then we could attack them while they their backs were turned

Guess I'll have to kidnap New Zealand, he's baby faced, they'll eat him

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**


	25. Day 25

**20:00**

**November 26**

**1932**

Dear Diary

I'm related to  **morons**

First the bigger moron kidnapped the other one and shoved him into a baby carriage and left him in the outback to lure out the dingos

The bigger idiot's plan almost worked had the other one not woken up and basically freaked out at wearing a one see and being stuck in a stroller

Cue both of them being attacked by dingos

You would think after that stupider one would give up on his so called 'war'

Nope

God help us if this continues

**Wy**


	26. Day 26

**9:00**

**November 27**

**1933**

Dear Diary

You won't believe the trauma I went through yesterday

Imagine if you can,relaxing in your room, then the next thing, nothing

THEN imagine yourself waking up not only in a ducking  **baby carriage** , dressed in a  **onesie,** but to see about twenty dingos sniffing at you

I think I shat myself alittle bit seeing all of them looking at me like I look at Jaffas

The next thing I know, that asshole came out of nowhere, screaming some bullshit about revenge while trying to shoot them

Note the word  **trying**

Then we're both running for our lives from these dingo bastards

I swear when we get back I'm gonna that Aussie's ass for pulling this shit

**New Zealand**


	27. Day 27

10:00

November 28

1932

Jett knew he had fucked up

"I have fucked up now"

He knew he shouldn't have underestimated those damn dingos

Duck those emus

Except Bob... Bob is cool 


	28. Day 28

**11:00**

**November 29**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Today I've been betrayed by my own kin

Technically I hate him, but still....

**Betrayed**

How was I betrayed you ask

Let me take you back on a mystical journey about 4 hours ago

~flashback~

Jett was sitting thinking about how to finally take birdy bastards

He had just thought of an actual good plan when other then England slammed the bloody open

My hand craved  **Mahogany** door, which is now broken

"Where is he, where is my precious colony!"

Jett looked at England amazed that he actually cared for him, his heart warmed at the thought, even though it was only bushy-brows

"I'm right here England!"

"Not you, you dumb arse, where's my precious New Zealand! What have you done to him now you wanker?!"

Jett's heart cracked as England ran to hug New Zealand, a cloud of darkness appeared

Somewhere a didgeridoo was playing a sorrowful tune

Jett knew what his next plan of attack was

When that tea-sucker, sweater wearing bushy-brows went to sleep that night, Jett was gonna put one of his extra bird eating nopes in England's bed tonight

Suck on that, that's for not picking me as the favorite

~end of le flashback~

Apparently I meant to slip a not poisonous nope in his bed, but I haven't slept in a couple of days so now England is going to be stranded at my place for the next bloody few days

Betcha that asshole is suck up to him so bad

Lucky me

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**


	29. Day 29

**8:00**

**November 30**

**1932**

England knew it wasn't going to be a good day when he woke up

For the queen's sake he was trapped in this bloody country because a certain colony just HAD to shove a poisonous spider in his bed

As he headed into the kitchen, he always didn't notice the crocodile just laying in the floor

England did what any man would do

Did he kill the beast? No

Did he ignore it and face his fears? No

He screamed like a little girl and jumped on the table

At that point Jett walked in to see what was going on, upon seeing England on the table shaking with fear, he continued his way to the stove where he was cooking some bacon

"Go on sheila, breakfast won't the ready for a bit"

"Why the bloody fuck is there a crocodile in your kitchen!"

"Sheila is my neighbor, be nice, I k ow how you treat your neighbors, last meeting at your place, I walked in on France in your bathroom, naked, and he's way more dangerous then my croc"

"We don't talk about the frog"

At this point New Zealand had come in with a fully prepared English breakfast, and had helped England off the table

"Sorry about him, you gotta get used to the dangerous creatures around here"

"I don't think I'll ever be used to those things"

"I meant Australia"

As New Zealand sat there obviously trying to suck up to England, Australia was busy on planning to poison Zealand with his very fatty foods


	30. Day 30

**9:00**

**December 1**

**1932**

**"** Mr Kirkland, we cannot give you cannons for your war against the emus"

"I got men dying out there! How do you expect me to fight a war without weapons!" Jett pleaded with his government hoping they would pity on him.

"There are men actually dying out there?"

"Well actually dying is a strong word, but one of the men did get toe pecked off by one of those demons, although it was Jonathan."

"Mr Kirkland, we have already given you 600 bullets, why are those things not dead?"

"You try shooting one of those things, they don't go down, they're like, Hey I've been shot, free bullet!"

The general rubbed his temples, feeling a migraine coming on. He pointed to the exit, hoping his country would just leave.

Jett sighed and left, but not without knocking down a plant.

~few hours time skip~

**7:00 p.m.**

Jett waited impatiently for his subordinate to return with the weapons.

Soon enough he saw his subordinate,Randy, struggling with a huge box.

"Great, you got them- Why is this box so small?"

"I got the supplies." Randy opened the box to reveal cans, of sardines. Jett felt an eye twitch.

"You had one job Randy, one job." Jett thought about shooting him, but that would just be more work.

"I got the cans like you asked."

"Can-nons, not cans, and why the hell would you steal sardines! No one likes them!" Jett angrily threw a can to the ground, cracking it open.

Bob, who for some reason Jett remembered to bring, immediately ran over and started to eat the sardines.

"Well, at least Bob likes it." Jett suddenly smiled as he thought of an idea.

A very stupid idea probably.

"Good job getting those sardines, now we can lure the emus away from Australia and into the ocean!"

Told you it was stupid.

Randy wondered if his boss was on drugs," How would we lure the emus sir?" Randy almost didn't want to know.

"With this didjeridu!" Jett proudly held up the instrument. "I'll be the piped piper of emus!"

Yep, Randy now knew his boss was on drugs.


	31. Day 31

**11:00 a.n.**

**December 2**

**1932**

The plan was actually working.

I know, I can't believe it either.

Jett and his band of hostag-friends, were using the sardines to lead the emus away.

Randy was driving the van, New Zealand and Jonathan were dumping can after can of sardines out of the truck and Jett, in all of his glory, was playing the didgeridoo.

Now things would have gone as planned had they, and by they I mean Jett, not brought Bob along for the ride.

~Cue insert Benny hill theme song~

Bob, who was taking a nap, had woken up to see her precious sardines being thrown out, and like a food obsessed animal she was, she tried to save her precious stuff.

She leaped for the food that was being tossed out, causing New Zealand to forget what he was doing and grab her, which cause Johnathan to fall out of the truck, seeing as New Zealand pushed him to catch her.

You would think the madness would end there. No.

You see, our dear Johnathan grabbed Jett on his way out, causing Jett to scream like a baby, which unfortunately caused Bob to panic and wiggle her way away from New Zealand and towards Randy, who also screamed like a baby and started to swerve and flip the truck into its side.

Thankfully everyone was ok and uninjured,they were just covered in sardines.

Now you would think the four stooges day would be finished, you see dear reader, it wasn't.

The emus had finally caught up to the now wrecked van and proceeded to peck at the men trying to eat the sardines.

You could see the hilarity as the men desperately tried to fight off the birds, but unfortunately, they got their asses kicked.

By emus.


	32. Day 32

**10:00**

**December 3**

**1932**

Dear Diary

I live with fucking  **morons**

I know I've probably said it before, but all of them are  **idiots**

Australia for even thinking that this plan would ever fucking work

New Zealand for going along and not stopping him

England's an even bigger asshat, knowing what they were doing and not stopping them

Naturally, someone had to knock some sense into them

That someone being me with a frying pan

Hungary was right, hitting idiots is fun

Thankfully with the concussion I gave Australia, we should have a day of peace

Please God

**Wy**


	33. Day 33

**10:00**

**December 4**

**1932**

Dear Diary

I finally get to leave this God forsaken country

Thank the King

I'm actually glad I left that dumb arse here

Feel bad for New Zealand though

Might miss that Bob thing, it was quite nice

Finally get to go back home and have my earl grey instead of that horrible Australian Bushell tea

I also have to keep that  **appointment** in Paris, must not forget to write about that in my  **calendar**

Hopefully that back water lizard riding wanker stops this bloody war

I thought about talking to my brothers to make him stop, but they would probably join him if they ever got word of this

Thank goodness, I can see plane from here

Thank god I'm going home

**Sincerely**   
**England**

**Ps**  
I miss that cheese eating surrender monkey... just a little bit


	34. Day 34

**11:00**

**December 5**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Why does everyone assume my ideas are idiotic

Okay, so I messed up one plan once

But come on it was basically Jonathan or Randy's fault

Alright, it may not have been their fault but that's who I'm placing the blame on

Anyway I think I may have one last plan to defeat those creatures, it's gonna take a couple of days to prepare, but you can bet your arse all of those things with be dead

With the except of Bob, because she's adorable

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**   
**Emu killer**


	35. Day 35

**11:00**

**December 6**

**1932**

Dear Diary

You know when you think an idea is great, but it's not when you actually do it

Yeah, that's what kinda happened

See,  I myself snuck into my own fort this time and got the cannons

Brilliant, am I right

But I'm running low on men as this war drags on

Something about not wasting their lives on anything stupid anymore

Anyway, we finally got near those things to fire

But unfortunately, SOMEONE lit it before I could say fire, and Apparantly these things are physic cause they all happened to duck at the exact same time

Now these two idiots fired every single cannon ball we had at them

Then they did the unthinkable

They fired last bag of Jaffas at them

My Jaffas


	36. Day 36

**12:00**

**December 7**

**1932**

America grinned as he looked out at the group of emus not too far away

He knew that this was his last chance to be a cowboy and he wasn't gonna was a prime opportunity like this

Who knew when the next time he would get to lasso and tie something down like the good ole days

Don't worry Alfred, given it a couple of decades and you'll be using that rope again 


	37. Day 37

**10:00**

**December 8**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Today I attempted a mini assault with just my wits and my men beside me

Well the few who would stay and fight beside me

We decided on a stealth mission to attack them

We managed to get a few before  **it** happened

What do I mean by  **it** you may ask

We got ambushed

By fucking  **dingos**

Those bastards came to the defence of the emus

I'm thinking those bird demons managed to get a treaty with those baby eating bastards

Now I got to treat these stupid bites they gave me

I'm starting to hate my own animals

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**


	38. Day 38

**11:00**

**December 9**

**1932**

Dear Diary

Today has been a big day, because tomorrow we will launch our final attack on the emus and hopefully be rid of them

Even more good news is apparently when that eyebrows jerk went home he told of my plight to his brothers and they've joined us to take them down

Scotland is really looking forward to tomorrow, already got his war paint and kilt ready

Even those two Irish boys are ready, Seamus and Dylan, although I'm alittle worried that they won't let anyone touch 'their' weapons and the fact that they brought 4 machine guns and several other weapons

Oh well not really my problem

Even New Zealand is ready to get this done and over with, he's even going to support is

Well his exact words were," I'll root for you in spirit, I'm staying here with Bob, because I'm not dumb enough to go fight one more battle against those demons"

Wy is ignoring me at the moment

Screw her, me and the boys can win this war without her help

I know we will be victorious

I can feel it

**Jett Kirkland**   
**Australia**


	39. Day 39

**9:00**

**December 10**

**1932**

This was it.

The final battle battle between men and beast.

Okay it was just a group of men with some weapons and an even bigger group of emus facing off against one another.

Jett looked around and saw not many men left to stay and fight with him, basically his kinda asshole dad, Scotland, his 2 uncles the Irelands, Jonathan, randy, New Zealand surprisingly and a couple of men from his army still with him.

He was a little nervous about this last battle, considering his dad was only in a kilt with his face painted doing his best William Wallace impression to rule up the men.

Not to mention his stupid as duck uncles didn't really bring any  **good** weapons,they stupidly left the machine guns back at the house, and brought only their bow and arrow and pipe bomb.

Jett felt like being an Italian and just surrendering to the bloody birds right then and there.

Scotland looked over each man,judging them, while carrying his claymore, "Alright men, since my son can't handle a few birds in his own and had to call for 'help', We have to take this things down ourselves, are you with me!?"

There was a massive silence as everyone looked at the Scot like he was crazy, and considering he's in body paint he may just be.

New Zealand wondered how he even related to these people," do we really have to do this?"

"Aye lad, that we do, since this namby pamby boy can't do shit right on his own!"

"Got that right."

"Besides, those things don't even look that threatening, might even make a bagpipe out of one of them when we're done."

Jett prayer that this would be over and done quickly and that they would be victorious.

Well he got half his wish answered, it was over and done quickly, despite Scotland leading the charge swinging that sword of his, and the twins 'help', the men quickly lost. Badly. To emus.

Yes, these men actually fucking lost to ostrich impersonators.

As Jett, his family and army started to retreat, leaving behind those truly stupid to actually keep fighting a losing battle, namely the twins who thought they could win with their 'weapons', and Jonathan and randy.

He muttered the only smart thing to say and what he probably what he should have said in the beginning when this whole thing started.

" **Fuck this shit, the emus win**."

\----------------------------------------------------------  
Finally this is done, I hope you've enjoyed this crack as much as I have

And Scotland being Australia's dad is a headcanon of mine

And no Scotland and iggy did not get together to create Australia, although him and France may have gotta together to create the north American bros


End file.
